It is getting easier with time but I don't really know if it will get better. Quite often I find myself thinking and having wonderfully "naughty" fant...sies about some of the things we both experienced and that we talked about wanting to explore and experiment with both in and out of the lifestyle. While we did enjoy swinging/swapping for several years there were things we often talked about wanting to try and experience including, but not limited to group sex, interracial, and some of the. I couldn’t wait to hump my wife and enter the same hole that my son had just entered.But my wife had different plans.“I will sleep with my darling beta tonight” she announced standing in middle of our drawing room. Both Nikhil and me were surprised.“whaat” both Nikhil and me and said at the same time.Ofcourse Nikhil seemed very elated by her decision and had a stupid grin on her face.“inafact from now onwards I will sleep with my son only” she added with a naughty smile.“ofcourse, provided if. I removed my shirt silently and put it on the floor.She continued to tug and pull on her excited nipples, lightly purring something over and over, but I couldn't quite decipher what she was uttering. Her hands stopped teasing her perky nipples, and after taking each breast in her dainty hands, she very slowly moved her finger tips down her lithe body. She brought onefinger to her subtle sunken navel, and I watched as her other hand very gradually proceeded to her pubic mound, building up her. I feel so light as I squeeze the trigger just to hear the heart deafening click as the hammer slams on the empty cylinder. My heart feels at ease as if wanting me to place a round in the chamber just to end the suffering my family has caused. I have cut my arm and still the pain wont leave and only lesses for more to creep into my soul. I feel death would be a preferred choice. I curse those downstairs having their fucking orgy. I just want to die. I hope what I am doing helps me do so. I just.
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